I had the pleasure to wake up one morning and walk along the beach. There’s nothing like the sound of the water washing up on the shore and the feeling of sand between my toes. I’m at peace when I’m on the beach because it seems as if everything fades as the waves come and go.
Every time the water meets the sand and goes back into the ocean it leaves a different mark. I began to wonder, what will my mark be? How will I be remembered? Will people remember how I made them feel? Things I said or didn’t say? Things I did or didn’t do? Will they remember my smile and laughter?
Walking The Beach
I have always felt like I needed closure. No matter what the situation was, I always wanted people to know how I felt or how they made me feel. I would often times loose sleep when things went unresolved or when I felt like someone wronged me. Eventually I realized that sometimes closure means leaving things, situations and even people alone and simply moving on. I had to remember to pray about whatever it was and put it in God’s hands. I also had to have faith that He would give me a sense of peace and that was better than closure.
I believe the best thing to do in moving on and creating an everlasting mark is to make sure your body of work, (your life) is done with integrity and humility. Life is not easy, we are not perfect and we should never miss an opportunity to start over and make better decisions. Pray without ceasing. Take responsibility for your actions. Apologize when you’re wrong, even if it’s not accepted. Love unconditionally. Give cheerfully. Enjoy life and the people in it. Live with no regrets. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Smile and laugh often. Forgive as Christ has forgiven you.
Mom left us with memories that will never fade and numerous and valuable life lessons. I will never forget this particular lesson I learned, while simply walking along the beach.
When you leave this place, leave your mark and be remembered.
The joys and inside jokes shared with Mom made having a relationship with her so easy and the hard times made it strong.
CATAWAMPUS: cat·a·wam·pus [kat-uh-wom-puhs] adjective 1.askew; awry. 2. positioned diagonally; cater-cornered.
When Mom would position herself into bed my brother Vernon would say “Mom, you lookin a little catawampus.” and that strange word (That I’ve never heard of before) would tickle Mom pink. She laughed for two reasons. 1. The word was funny. 2. It would literally take her 101 ways to fashion herself into a comfortable position in bed.
Video: I would often times watch Mom get ready or go shopping and watch her try on things. Mom had a “Fashion Fair (her favorite make up) Runway Walk”. Sitting on the sideline watching her I would make lil comments about how she looked and primped. “Whoo chile, watch out der now look at Rev. Martha!!” She would turn to me and say “Get out my video Merical Joy”.
Mom was a fashion extraordinaire and very prideful of her appearance. She never wanted to be seen NOT looking her best, regardless of how she felt. Mom came home from church one Easter Sunday and she looked stunning. I mean the hat matched the trim of the suit and so did the shoes. Only MY took the time to complete her look by dying her gloves and pantyhose mint green. My niece Carrie being silly and looked at Mom and said “Gran, what you doing with that flower pot on your head.” If I only had my camera that day. You see the outfit was a full length mint green coat with the matching long dress. The flowers were on the trim on the bottom the coat and around the sleeve. The dress had the same flower trim as my Mom’s hat, lets not forget the J Rene’ shoes that matched too. Mom looked in the mirror and gave herself the fiercest overlook and retired to her room. Not to throw shade at Kenya Moore’s “Gone with the Wind Twirl” but MY Mom, The Late Reverend Martha Virginia Alexander did it best!
These are the memories that make me smile and memories that I will cherish and never forget. Please create and cherish memories with your loved ones. Take plenty of pictures for they will provide comfort in the times of grief.