From the beginning of all this my family and I have gone through so many different emotions.
Here’s what I went through…
Denial: When we first found out about what it was that Mom had, I began to think that maybe the Doctors didn’t know what they were talking about. Maybe there was a mistake in the test. I did research and I didn’t like what I was told. “This can’t be true!”
Anger/Rage: I was outraged. I was so mad at God. How could He do this to my Mother, my family! My Mom a strong, faithful, prayerful woman… How could something like this happen to her, why is He punishing us, punishing her? No one wants to hear the word “Cancer” or “There is NO cure”. There are so many bad people out there who are walking around without a care in the world yet here we are, faced with something that we can’t understand. Something that there are NO answers for.
Acceptance: Once treatment started, things set in for me. This was REAL. Radiation, Chemotherapy, all of it was REAL. To me despite the odds, Mom was the exception to the rule and we were going to make sure of it!
Peace: As time passed and things have gone from good, to bad, to everything in between I had to learn to trust God again. He wasn’t “doing anything” to hurt us. If anything He has shown grace and mercy. Mom is at peace. She loves the Lord with all her heart and she trusts Him. When I look at her, yes it hurts to not see the same woman from a year ago but she is still MY MOTHER, MY STRENGTH and MY HERO. Through her, I am learning peace.